Lessons From Parenting a Son

Boys and girls, they are different.

I know, I know. What a profound, original statement.

I didn't realize how true it was until we had Samuel. Since he's turning three in just a few weeks, I thought I'd write down some of the things he's taught me.

1. Boys don't wear panties. They wear undies, underwear, briefs, whatever, but never, ever panties. The first time I referred to them as such, Mike impaled me with his laser eyes. I almost died.

2. Anything can be a weapon- any kind of weapon. We've been shot stabbed, blown up, impaled, and decapitated. He uses his hand, a book, a baby doll, one of his (many) guns, a sword, really just whatever's handy. What's really great is when he stabs you with his sword then shoots you with it.

3. Pee bubbles. I didn't learn of this until this morning. Boys stand up to pee, right? The force of it hitting the water makes bubbles. And let me tell you, they delight little boys.

4. Sticks and rocks are the very best. We went down to Roy and Betty's over the weekend. We walked down to the point, where we will eventually build our house, and on the walk back, Sam and I were holding hands. We were going pretty slowly as he was pretty tired from all the running and wildness he and Grace had previously participated in. Every couple steps we would have to stop so he could pick up a stick and examine it. We categorized them as big, little, long, and good. It was all very scientific. The rocks in the driveway were also perfection.

5. It's really okay to eat dirt. This one took a while to sink in. Mike had admitted to eating dirt when he was little. I mocked him endlessly, while being grossed out at the same time. Then last summer I caught myself watching Sam put rocks, sticks, and dirt in his mouth and not really caring.

6. There are other colors besides purple and pink. I was beginning to believe this was untrue. When Miracle was little, everything had to be purple and pink. Grace is in that stage now. They are her "most favorite colors." But I'm learning there is also blue! And green! And red! And orange! And they are all delightful!

7. You really don't have to take a class on making sound effects. I always thought this was some special class the boys took in school. They were taught how to make the necessary car, plane, and train sounds. I thought they were taught the fine art of gunfire and bombs, and all the other noises boys like to make. Nope, it's not true. It's like they just know how to do it.

8. You will love them like no other person in the world. I love my girls. They are wonderful, charming, funny young ladies. I would do anything for them. But there's just something about my boy. He's pretty much had me wrapped around his finger from the very beginning. And you know what? Of all my children, he's the most tender-hearted. He'll give me hugs and kisses, climb up for a snuggle, ask me if I'm okay. I was on the couch with a migraine one day and he went and got his blankie and brought it out and covered me up with it. He gave me that which was most precious to him so I would feel better.

He completely melts my heart.